When you become a parent, suddenly you’re aware of all the parenting advice you can get a hold of and can apply in raising your own kid. However not all advice on parenting are expert advice. Even those advice that come from your own mother could be faulty and may not apply well especially for you. Yahoo! Shine publishes an article about parenting entitled “10 Worst Parenting Lies” [It could make or break your parenting style.] I’m sure you could find some surprise realizations about the most common myths and misconceptions involved in parenting.
The article is written in the perspective of a mother with first-hand experience with parenting, and who may have learned about these queer lies the unpleasant way. Before you jump in on following any unsolicited advice, most probably from a stranger posting a blog about parenting online, confirm it first with facts and get the point-of-view of mothers who have been there done that. It may also help if you read these not-so-known parenting lies then see for yourself.
’10 Worst Parenting Lies’
Parents want all the best for their children. But sometimes, we tend to over-do things with parenting. We become too obsessed with the responsibility to the point of making ourselves depressed.
Some parents even become too controlling of the lives of their kids, thinking they only want to make sure everything is “okay”. But it is not okay. Kids are individuals too and our only task as parents is to nourish and guide them. Not to dictate things or decide for them, endangering them to lose their identities. We should allow them to be kids, shouldn’t we? Let’s help them enjoy their childhood, because in the process, we also get to enjoy being parents by taking it easy with parenting. We also need time for ourselves and the down-time we give to our kids would also benefit them.
Here are some info and tips on:
‘Slow Parenting’ – for Some Space and Sanity”, and
How Moms Could Enjoy Their Life While Parenting Young Children
Hope it helps!
Are you trying to become the best parent for your kids? But are you trying too hard? There is a very thin line between good parenting and Over-Parenting, and over-parenting turns out to be counterproductive for our kids than what we would have wanted otherwise.
Psychologist, educator, author, and consultant Madeline Levine points out some fallacies in some of the different ways we’re doing over-parenting – http://www.sfgate.com/opinion/article/Over-parenting-s-faulty-logic-3779426.php. We really want to avoid these if we want our kids to truly succeed in life.
Levine also shares some tips, so make sure you check out the article. It’s a worthy read for all concerned parents.
‘Intensive Parenting’ has become the norm during the past few decades, with mothers over-exerting themselves to be the best moms for their kids. They read all sorts of parenting books and follow them diligently, in fact too strictly and it is not making them any happier. They believe they are doing it for their kids, which although an admirable trait among loving mothers, experts are starting to think that it is becoming a serious problem as these ‘intensive parenting’ moms have been found to become more and more depressed in taking every child responsibility to themselves.
These unhappy ‘super moms’ think that “mother is best” and would limit getting any kind of child care or parenting help, even from their own mothers and husbands. And it is almost impossible to influence them to do things in moderation, for instance in providing enough stimulation to their kids, despite the advice of specialists to provide some downtime as well, not just for the children, but for themselves as well. While there has not yet been any proofs (yet) that (over-) engaging your kids would be indeed good for them as they grow up, it could not be too obvious that a depressed mother could also affect the child in a negative way.
You could learn more about this commentary on Time.com.
Different couples have different ways of sharing their parenting duties with their spouses. Some people agree that fathers should also partake in the caregiving of the child (like feeding or bathing); but most people also accept that mothers should be the primary caregiver. A study though concluded that effective co-parenting could still be possible even without the fathers doing or sharing the child caregiving tasks.
The study appeared in the January 2011 issue of the Developmental Psychology journal, and it showed that the group of fathers who only played with their kids and did not share the caregiving responsibilities with their wives still received ample support from their wives or the mothers. On the other hand, the fathers who shared the caregiving responsibilities with their wives experienced less support and more conflict with their wives, most probably because of their disagreements with how the parenting should be done with the kids.
The study does not rule out though that some couples still do work effectively in co-parenting their kids while sharing the caregiving responsibilities equally. In the end, what is most important is for the couple to decide which set-up works best when it comes to caring for the children, at the same time determine which way is more beneficial or healthier for their co-parent relationship.
Parenting children ages 3 to 8 years old can be hard not just for parents, but also for their children. For children, it is a stage of major transitions. At times they would need feelings of security and affection, and other times they would want to feel independent and test the limits within their surroundings. Sometimes, they want to find out what will or will not be tolerated. And as the kids undergo these conflicting needs and pleasures, then may throw tantrums and exhibit destructive behavior during the times when they don’t get what they want.
For parents, this is often shocking and challenging to handle. Parents may feel a loss of control and feel anger and frustration for not being able to get their child to cooperate. On the other hand, parents may sometimes also feel guilt or anxious that they may be lacking enough skills with parenting and are over-all concerned about their child’s progress (at school and whether their child is making enough friends.) With this, parents often feel confused thinking as to how much freedom and control they should give their kids. You must have frequently felt guilty wondering whether you handled a situation right or perhaps whether you have expected too much from your small child.
Parents can use appropriate discipline while also being responsive and nurturing to their kids. This can help their children learn effective ways to self-regulate and solve their problems, and in the long-term help them grow and develop to become more socially competent and less aggressive individuals. It will help advance your child’s emotional, social, and academic development, and you will feel more confident and less guilty in rearing your child.
You can read more on these principles on “Responsive and Nurturing Parenting” – HERE
Summer living may be a lot easier or laid back, but it certainly is not the time to waste the chance for your kids to learn, letting them just slack the entire summer. Summer is the perfect opportunity to let them learn some important life skills they would need as they grow older. You can become a better parent and guide them through in learning the following life skills:
1. Domestic Resposibility. Let them take on the bigger chores at home like doing the laundry or mowing the lawn. This will help them learn some important “move-out-skills” which they would be able to use once they become someone else’s roommate.
2. Self-entertainment. Let them learn to entertain themselves independently, or without the use of a computer or TV. Get your kids a library card or a digital camera (which they can take around the neighborhood to explore and discover things they had never thought so interesting).
3. Time management. This is a very important skill to learn which helps them become more in control of their life and activities. Help them plan out all your family’s upcoming summer activities, marking them down in the calendar.
4. Body-Mind learning. Physical skills are just as important as academic skills. Encourage your kid to be more physically active by letting him engage more in sports, and to learn skills through observation instead of reading.
5. Inter-age communication. At school, your kid is mostly with other kids his age so learning to communicate with people in other age-groups is something he needs to practice outside of school. Assign him to become a baby sitter to his younger cousins or let him chat up with different people in the grocery store, or, you let his grandparents visit often so they could talk.
6. Goal-setting. This summer, let your kids grab the opportunity to set a goal and achieve it, whether finishing reading an (n) number of pages or doing an (n) number of pushups. It will challenge his skills and boost his confidence.
You can read more about how you can help your kids learn some life skills during summer on Babble.com (Article by Asha Dornfest, the Accidental Expert)
Parenting News – Celebrity mom Kourney Kardashian recently tweets a photo of the book entitled “The Attachment Parenting Book” with a note “excited to read [it].” Kourney has been a strong supporter of holistic super-healthy lifestyles with her huge passion for eating organics and her tweet might just be the sign that she is going to apply it all they way into her parenting style.
Kourney has already followed some of the habits of Attachment Parenting wi th her first child Mason, co-sleeping with him and obsessively feeding him organic food – and it looks like she is going 100% in applying the entire parenting style with her second child, daughter Penelope Scotland.
The said style of parenting has recently been all the buzz because of Time Magazine’s cover and feature story about extreme Attachment Parenting – with the photo of blogger Jamie Lynne Grumet confidently standing while her 3-year old son is latched to her nipple. The May 2012 released issue includes the caption “Why attachment parenting drives some mothers to extremes – and how Dr. Sears became their guru.”
Attachment Parenting is based on psychiatrist John Bowlby’s theory that humans or babies innately seek close connection with their primary caregiver or parent. He implies that developing a strong affectionate parent-child attachment relationship is necessary to develop the child’s confidence, and prevent him from having emotional and behavioral developmental problems in the future such as agression and depression. Among the style’s most noteworthy practices are long-term breastfeeding and co-sleeping.
Will Kourtney Kardashian’s devotion to this parenting style attract other hollywood moms and regular parents to follow suit?
It is the London Olympics season and everyone is jeering for their favorite teams. Everyone is cheering for their favorite athelets – and parents are wooing for their kids. When TODAY’s Matt Lauer and co-correspondent Savannah Gurthie interview the proud parents of the women’s gymnastics team USA, the parents leave some advice on how to support your kids all the way in achieving their Olymipic dreams.
The parents share what it is like to see their kids accomplish their great althetics dreams and leave some tips to fellow parents of aspiring Olympians. The ‘golden girls’ of the Olympics gymnastics also reveal how it feels like to have their parents rooting for them during the competitions, and only one thing could be ascertained – that the moral support of the parents to their Olympian kids contribute a huge positive impact on the kids’ performance.
It turns out that it is much more than the parents’ urge to cheer because they feel proud in seeing their kids compete (and win) in the most prestigious sports competition. It is all part of responsible parenting. You help your kids push themselves to perform their best when you are cheering for them. This way, you help them achieve their dreams just by encouraging them.
To quote Mike Maroney, McKayla Maroney’s father, “The best thing a parent can do is just support them, and let them live their dream.” “Don’t make it your dream. It has to be theirs, because if they want it bad enough they’re going to be able to achieve it, and just give them all the tools that can give them that opportunity to have the success that their dream is all about.”
So that is how you can help turn a child into an Olympian.
You can read more of this MSNBC Today correspondence HERE.
Do you often find yourself in need of parenting advice, but don’t have time to seek it out? Reading a book or researching information online can take hours and even days, but new videos from the Akron Children’s Hospital in Ohio take just one minute. The videos come every Wednesday from psychologist Geoffrey Putt, and you can find them on YouTube or the hospital’s website.
Parenting Magazine’s Parenting Ages & Stages iPhone app has been so successful that the company is releasing a similar app for Droid phones. The app is number two app in the Lifestyles category at Apple’s App Store. It provides parents with information about their child’s development and milestones.
Kids have been turning cardboard boxes into playhouses for years, but they’ve come a long way since the days of your childhood! Check out these great ideas for do-it-yourself cardboard playhouses.
Baby’s can be expensive; that’s nothing new. But could you be cutting corners on items like clothing, diapers, and baby food? Some parents say you can. Check out these 10 tips for saving money on baby items.
It’s one of your worst nightmares as a parent: your child falls and suddenly can’t move her arm or leg, you hear a snapping sound, or it starts to swell. It can be a scary moment, but you shouldn’t panic. Here is a guide to what do when your child breaks a bone.
Studies have suggested over the years that kids with hobbies live more fulfilled lives. So, what sort of hobbies should you start with your kids? From music to sports here are a few ideas: 4 Hobbies to Start with Your Kids.